Tuesday, October 29, 2024

Alia Bhatt :-)

Alia is a troublemaker! Full stop! When I first saw her I thought she's an Eskimologist or Geologer but she turned out to be an actress or whatever -- I read somewhere -- sometime ago -- in the pulp media -- Duh! of course -- that she -- unremorsefully or so -- (audaciously or so eh?) -- shooed, squelched and muffled her bitter and vulturine critics -- massacred 'em -- It's tantamount to war crimes eh? -- How'd she do this with such blatant impunity -- whatever -- I don't believe that -- moreover I'm quite wary of Brits -- Wiki tells me that she's a British citizen or whatever -- Yeah, yeah I'm incorrigibly xenophobic! -- reminds me of Salt March and Mahatma Gandhi Ji -- appalling atrocities, victimization, proactive aggression, unending subjugation and so forth....... and I get very vengeful or so -- I'm NOT kidding -- Anyways, so I was saying that Alia is a troublemaker -- Anyways, I dunno why this cool Ranbir dude fell for her in a big way -- guys make horrid marital decisions -- duh -- Okay fine--agreed (grudgingly okay?) -- Alia is a female mythological being who is partly divine and partly human -- a deified woman and all that -- No doubt about that -- but--er--ahem--Alia is a troublemaker! -- Okay Alia Ji and Ranbir Ji -- I've to go now -- I'm very busy -- I've to feed undomesticated pigeons -- and, people-watching, hang out time et cetera -- I love you guys so much -- I'm a Hunchbacked Whirling Dervish, Shaman, Wizard et cetera -- If any evil sorcerers irk you guys again -- let me know -- I'll scramble zillions of very evil daemons to zap 'em -- my remuneration is only 140 Rupees after not-so-serious haggling. -- :-) I never say goodbye because there's no such word in Navajo! 

Monday, October 28, 2024

A whacky rhyme for Aima :-)

Aima Aima A miracle worker

Dolly in Blue baggy trousers 

She'd look coy in a White Turtleneck sweater

I look at her

And, she looks at me

We meet in the parallel universe.


She's like a bluebird!


Dolly-posh let's go to a safari

Yeah, yeah in your swanky Ferrari.


Golden Delicious

You're so pretty and precious.


Yummy, yummy, yum-yum 

Honeypot where's my Nicotine chewing gum.


You thought I'd invariably ask for a price

For flour and spice.

Nope! Nope! You got me wrong!

I'm NOT a quack. 

I NEVER fleece.


Meet me in Greece

Greenwich Mean Time

I'm a Dervish, dame

Give me just a few dimes!

Sunday, October 27, 2024


 

Saturday, October 26, 2024

Kajal Aggarwal

There's this gigantic hoarding -- near my place -- there's a girl on it -- unbelievably pretty -- If I weren't a believer -- I'd have believed -- irrevocably so -- that she's a goddess -- there's something undeniably ethereal about her -- I've stayed here -- about fifty years or so -- on this planet -- (and) I've never seen anyone more prettier -- but pretty isn't the word -- she's this uncanny otherworldly vibes -- you just can't simply refute it -- she's someone who'd change your life unalterably -- You're teleported to some unearthly place -- some planet with mythical beings -- she's very bewitching -- a femme fatale with absolutely no remorse or guilt for the trials and tribulations of men -- she's someone who'd -- very easily -- instigate you to start not just a brawl but a war -- a real war -- you'd relinquish -- in a blink of an eye -- your knighthood for her -- If I were a king and if she (was) a commoner -- I'd have joyfully abdicated my crown for her -- no kidding -- Nobody sane would think twice -- An inimitable specimen of a (female) Homo Sapien -- but hey wait a minute -- she's a perfect clone -- that's none other than her sister -- kiddo sister I guess eh? -- Wiki says her name is Nisha -- Anyways, I Blogged about other girls -- in my characteristic whacky monologic style -- but I couldn't write about Kajal -- I dunno -- You've to be very discreet -- You've to choose your words very wisely -- writing about her is no picnic -- I see her songs, interviews for a few minutes -- then I just switch to something else -- something more.....I dunno  -- I just can't -- I dunno why -- I just get so spellbound or whatever -- awed? --- overwhelmed? -- I dunno why I'm Blogging about her today -- I don't see a sane reason to do that -- but maybe deep down -- subconsciously or so -- I want her to know that I think about her a lot -- quite often I must confess -- That's all -- paparazzi and all that -- write about her all the time -- of course -- Deep down I want her to read this Blog post and I also want her to know that I live in the same city -- I fret the day I might bump into her....... O Lord, please don't hasten the Hour.....LOL ROFL hehehehehehe :-)

Friday, October 25, 2024

A whacky rhyme: Just penned. LOL ROFL hehehehehehe

Trance, trance

Cavaliers of Gwalior

Shooting stars and Meteor shower 

Friendly neighbourhood copper

Flying in a chopper.


Devil is very evil

Palace, hut or shack

Evil comes back

Swordsmen patrol

Do NOT lower your guard TONIGHT!

Eagle, weasel or hawk


Alpha, Bravo and Foxtrot

I'm on your side

DO NOT ride hovercrafts

Witch on a broom

Devil wakes up at half-moon.


Do NOT lower your guard TONIGHT!

Village, city or town

Witch, Wizard or elf owl

I'm neither a foe or a fool

No worries: I'm watching your back. :-)


-- Maqsood Qureshi aka Hunchbacked Whirling Dervish :-)

Wednesday, October 23, 2024

What are terrorism threat levels?

Terrorism threat levels indicate the likelihood of a terrorist attack in the UK. There are two published threat levels. 

There are 5 categories at which the threat levels could be set: 

LOW - an attack is highly unlikely 

MODERATE - an attack is possible, but not likely 

SUBSTANTIAL - an attack is likely 

SEVERE - an attack is highly likely 

CRITICAL - an attack is highly likely in the near future 

Thursday, October 17, 2024

Then he said: “But when the disbelieving slave is about to depart this world and enter the Hereafter, there come down to him from heaven angels with black faces, bringing sackcloth, and they sit around him as far as the eye can see. Then the Angel of Death comes and sits by his head, and he says, ‘O evil soul, come forth to the wrath of Allah and His anger.’ Then his soul disperses inside his body, then comes out cutting the veins and nerves, like a skewer passing through wet wool. When he seizes it, they do not leave it in his hand for an instant before they take it and put it in that sackcloth, and there comes from it a stench like the foulest stench of a dead body on the face of the earth. Then they ascend and they do not pass by any group of angels but they say, ‘Who is this evil soul?’ and they say, ‘It is So and so the son of So and so, calling him by the worst names by which he was known in this world, until they reach the lowest heaven. They ask for it to be opened to them and it is not opened.” Then the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) recited (interpretation of the meaning): “for them the gates of heaven will not be opened, and they will not enter Paradise until the camel goes through the eye of the needle” [Al-A’raaf 7:40] He said: “Then Allah says, ‘Record the book of My slave in Sijjeen in the lowest earth, and return him to the earth, for from it I created them, to it I will return them and from it I will bring them forth once again.’ So his soul is cast down.” Then the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) recited the verse (interpretation of the meaning): “and whoever assigns partners to Allah, it is as if he had fallen from the sky, and the birds had snatched him, or the wind had thrown him to a far off place” [Al-Hajj 22:31] He said: “Then his soul is returned to his body, and there come to him two angels who make him sit up and they say to him, ‘Who is your Lord?’ He says, ‘Oh, oh, I don’t know.’ They say, ‘What is your religion?’ He says, ‘Oh, oh, I don’t know.’ Then a voice calls out from heaven, ‘Prepare for him a bed from Hell and clothe him from Hell, and open for him a gate to Hell.’ Then there comes to him some of its heat and hot winds, and his grave is constricted and compresses him until his ribs interlock. Then there comes to him a man with an ugly face and ugly clothes, and a foul stench, who says, ‘Receive the bad news, this is the day that you were promised.’ He says, ‘Who are you? Your face is a face which forebodes evil.’ He says, ‘I am your evil deeds.’ He says, ‘O Lord, do not let the Hour come, do not let the Hour come.’” This hadith was classed as saheeh by Shaykh al-Albani in Ahkaam al-Janaa’iz, p. 156

Friday, October 11, 2024

Folks: I keyed in a whacky rhyme for Aima. Just now. It's a draft copy. :-)

Aima puts me in a deep trance

We sing and dance

You and I

Around the world in 80 days?

Life is a labyrinth -- yeah, yeah it's a maze!


Life is just a fantasy -- a passing fancy 


Aima is a zippy zappy girl

Like a fun car chase

Let's go to France!


I'm a computer freak

I wanna be her boo

I know she'd just simply

Eek eek eek


Black cowboy boots and blue denim jeans

Brown sheriff tie and white turtleneck 


Custard cream

She my girl 

my my 

dream.

Thursday, October 10, 2024

Wednesday, October 9, 2024

Hypothetical Questions :-)

#1. What would be your dream job?

Barnstorming / Explorer / Spy / Counter-terrorist professional


#2. If you could have 3 wishes granted, what would they be?

Power to Heal. Invisibility. Flying. Seriously eh? I'd ask for infinite wishes! LOL ROFL 


#3. If you HAD to change your name, what would you change it to?

Charles Sobhraj


#4 If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live?

Amongst 'Uncontacted Tribes'.


#5 Name three exotic countries you would like to visit

America. United Arab Emirates. Explore India particularly villages. 


#6 When you die - what part of your personality do you want to be remembered for?

Mister Hyde!


#7 If you could add a single option to your car, what would you add?

I love bullock carts! Seriously, eh? Humvee. Mount a high caliber weapon, maybe!  


#8 If you could start your own restaurant, what would it be?

Oh, something like KFC setup but only Chai! LOL ROFL 


#9 You're given $100,000 and you have to spend it all in one day and cannot buy any real estate, any kind of boat or vehicle and no investments or putting it in the bank, what do you spend it on? Be specific.

My girlfriend.


#10 If you had an unlimited shopping spree at one store, which store would that be?

A computer shack or something like that. :-)


#11 If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

I'd like to be Pulling Your Own Strings-COMPLIANT! :-)


What goal do you most want to accomplish in your lifetime?

My moral and religious duties.


Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

Drat, I lost my Ouija board! Seriously eh? A pilot maybe -- at least PPL. And, a 2nd Dan in Krav Maga, maybe.


What do you dream about at night?

Pretty girls with braces! Seriously, eh? I don't remember my dreams anymore. 


If you knew you were going to die in 24 hours, name three things you would do in the time you had left.

1. VDO-call my family. 2. Hug my girlfriend. 3. Pray to God for forgiveness. I dunno...I never thought about it. 


If you could get some plastic surgery, what part would you change.

Hmm. My nose maybe! LOL ROFL Dunno.


What would your dream house be like?

Tree House.


What crazy activities do you dream of trying someday?

Skydiving. Mountaineering. Jet pack, maybe. 


If you could go on a road trip with any person (dead or alive), who would you choose and where would you go?

My mother and father...Mecca and Madina. 


What one fun goal do you feel you must do before you die?

Marry my girlfriend! 


Do you want children? If so how many?

Yep. Twins: A boy and a girl.


What will the world be like in 25 years?

Where's my Ouija Board! Seriously eh? Humans and Aliens in a true symbiotic relationship / Coexisting peacefully! LOL ROFL 

Tuesday, October 8, 2024


 

Thursday, August 9, 2018 Reprint: A fictitious brattish Arabian Princess and her bedouin aide-de-camp: SUNDAY, APRIL 23, 2017 Dhow ready for you missui Same familiar voice of rugged hunchbacked bedioun My father's most trusted lieutenat A crescent sword dangling by his side a gust of wind -- that seems to bother him somehow The audacity of his Samurai-like gait A mare whimpers and he pats in his charasteric dismissive gesture Subduedly flamboyant -- debonair -- that smirk on his face -- A chaps -- magenta or something -- it's charcoal-ish now A war trophy -- No head hunting anymore -- show any tribes He told me once with a shrugg nonchalant curse-like tone -- oh those spurs -- not even for menace makers Duel -- Jostle -- Do I look that intimidating to you eh -- Missui -- what's your name before you went to .... The uninimous chosen leader of warrior race A spine-chilling momentary glint in his pupil He ain't hunchbacked -- it's his way of obeisance His loyality rests with my father -- Mills and Boons -- That's what he thinks of me -- I guess Discreet -- hoarse -- monosyllables -- like giving them marching orders Doesn't even snooze -- siesta -- he trots to souk Hubble-bubble occassionally -- otherwise, Come To The Marlboro Country It's real sultry -- re-schedule your -- next summer break maybe Yes, yes he's so copycatish and fake -- gotta go now. Bye. Hey, Mister Cowboy -- Where's my Black tea huh? Damn -- did he hear that or what -- eavesdropping on me. Wait let my grandfather come. Hey, mister stonedeaf -- dont we pay you slave. Posted by Maqsood Qureshi at 9:58 PM

The verses from Surat al-A’araf, which are as follows (interpretation of the meaning): “[Pharaoh] said: ‘If you have come with a sign, show it forth, if you are one of those who tell the truth.’ Then [Musa] threw his stick and behold! it was a serpent, manifest! And he drew out his hand, and behold! It was white (with radiance) for the beholders. The chiefs of the people of Pharaoh said: ‘This is indeed a well-versed sorcerer; He wants to get you out of your land, so what do you advise?’ They said: ‘Put him and his brother off (for a time), and send callers to the cities to collect — That they bring to you all well-versed sorcerers.’ And so the sorcerers came to Pharaoh. They said: ‘Indeed there will be a (good) reward for us if we are the victors.’ He said: ‘Yes, and moreover you will (in that case) be of the nearest (to me).’ They said: ‘O Musa! Either you throw (first), or shall we have the (first) throw?’ He [Musa] said: ‘Throw you (first).’ So when they threw, they bewitched the eyes of the people, and struck terror into them, and they displayed a great magic. And We revealed to Musa (saying): ‘Throw your stick,’ and behold! It swallowed up straight away all the falsehood which they showed. Thus truth was confirmed, and all that they did was made of no effect. So they were defeated there and returned disgraced. And the sorcerers fell down prostrate. They said: ‘We believe in the Lord of the ‘Alamin (mankind, jinn and all that exists). The Lord of Musa and Harun.’” [Al-A`raf 7:106-122]




 

Friday, October 4, 2024